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Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Flatland

Also, I apologize for the time I climbed down into your world and everyone freaked out about the lesbian orgy overseen by a priest.
Posted by taocwang at 5:00 AM 0 comments
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Monday, March 29, 2010

Recipes

To be fair, the braised and confused newt on a bed of crushed Doritos turned out to be delicious.
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Friday, March 26, 2010

Brain Worms

Hey, it says here that if you dream about your teeth falling out, it means they're spreading.
Posted by taocwang at 5:00 AM 0 comments
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Wednesday, March 24, 2010

The Flake Equation

Statistics suggest that there should be tons of alien encounter stories, and in practice there are tons of alien encounter stories. This is known as Fermi's Lack-of-a-Paradox.
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Monday, March 22, 2010

Furtive

... go go gadget video camera. Go go gadget cup.
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Friday, March 19, 2010

Time Machine

We never see any time travelers because they all discover it's a huge mistake. This is also why your friend at the lab suddenly looked about a year older recently.
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Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Numbers

The typical internet user (who wants to share) has an IQ of 147 and a 9-inch penis. Well, better than the reverse, I guess.
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Monday, March 15, 2010

Porn For Women

Yes, there are a lot of longing looks across the bridge of Galactica first, but that's beside the point!
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Friday, March 12, 2010

GeoIP

'Meet hot young singles in your mom's basement today'? Man, screw you, GeoIP.
Posted by taocwang at 5:00 AM 0 comments
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Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Single Ladies

Using a ring to bind someone you covet into your dark and twisted world? Wow, just got the subtext there. Also, the apparently eager Beyoncé would've made one badass Nazgȗl.
Posted by taocwang at 5:00 AM 0 comments
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Monday, March 8, 2010

Seismograph

The reverse only works if the subject has a nervous twitch.
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Friday, March 5, 2010

Collatz Conjecture

The Strong Collatz Conjecture states that this holds for any set of obsessively-hand-applied rules.
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Wednesday, March 3, 2010

I Am

Great, LO-M. Do you speak Bocce? I'm supposed to find one that speaks Bocce.
Posted by taocwang at 5:00 AM 0 comments
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Monday, March 1, 2010

Sex Dice

You roll for initiative, and ... [roll] ... wow, do you ever take it.
Posted by taocwang at 5:00 AM 0 comments
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